Chemtrails scientifically proven to be traced to Reptilians.

You know those trails you see up in the clouds?  I have.  Every day I step outside my house and scream at them.  Those things do NOT belong there.  Although scientists have not been able to find the direct health hazards caused by chemtrails, they have recently found the source, and what surprised me most was that they were not caused by the Mounties.  The real cause is... Reptilian Aliens.  Those pesky varmints that are always snatching our livestock and dropping them back down,  nothing left but bones.  And now, after infiltrating our government AND our agriculture, they have begun poisoning our skies.  Start buying gas masks, because at some point, our human lungs will no loonger be able to stand the fumes from their spaceships, which are covered by cloaking devices.